Friday, February 16, 2007

Hollywoooood!!!!

...You've screwed with the wrong dude.

I went to see Ghost Rider today with a buddy. The movie was a flaming pile, but that isn’t the point of this post. I was watching the previews when a romantic comedy trailer came on. Halfway through I recognized something that seemed rather familiar…

Check out the trailer then read on (anyone without high-speed Internet, too bad. I told you to get it and that it was cheaper than the dial-up you have now)

Did you see it? About two thirds of the way through? He’s sitting in the playhouse and playing fetch with the children. Now, where o’ where could I have seen that before? Hmmmmmm, perhaps right friggin’ here a few years back! I swear to God if they had been swinging Boxaboo's© at the begining, I would have the right to sue. Hollywood, you thieving unoriginal assholes! If there is one thing I’ve learned from the past couple of weeks its that I can do it better…and I’ve decided I will. That’s right you fat cat jerks, I’m gonna write my own screen play and its gonna be great. I mean it too, no jokes. I am pissed as hell that crap factories like Ghost Rider and Little Miss Sunshine get all sorts of praise while other great movies like Sin City and Foxy Brown get snubbed by the Academy. Incidentally both those directors got together and are coming out with Grindhouse; I can’t wait.

So there you go. Do I know what the story is gonna be about? Not really. Do I have a premise, plot or budget? No. Will it ever hit a major studio? Well only if it is flung from my car as I am driving by screaming obscenities. Still, that is the way Evil Dead was made and many others and by God I can do it too. So if you want a part you better start sending me head shots and bio’s cause I got a feeling the roles are gonna fill up fast.

3 comments:

mommyjolle said...

Do it! No point just ranting, put your effort where your mouth is...maybe you can have a whole side career in screen writing! I can see it now...MARK JOLLE-archaeologist by day/screen writer by night and superhero on the week-ends! (I threw in the superhero part, maternal pride, I guess)
.......(Sigh) Can I play the Shelly Winters role?

Da Beef said...

Ya know whats great....I watched the trailer before I read any of your blog. As soon as I saw him playing fetch with the kid.....I laughed my arss off! That's great. At least he was in a playhouse and not in "The Shack".

So...when can we expect this movie? Do we have a time frame so I know when I can stop biting my nails in anticipation? Oh...what were the results of your plane survey?

Mad Mike said...

All I ask is that you include a nerf gun battle scene where you get shot in the face. Ohh yeah and I want Chow Yun-fat to play me but dubbed over with Christopher Walken's voice.