Tuesday, April 03, 2007

100 Posts and still going…strong?

Well, here it is my 100th post. Wow, let me just soak this up for a second (pause). Whew, what a moment. I would just like to take some time to thank everyone who kept this thing going…namely myself. I would also like to promise that this blog will continue for as long as I care to keep posting and that it will be as random as ever, if not more so. Also, I vow that you the four people who regularly read this drivel will constantly be spoon-fed my outrageous notions, poor grammar, and ridiculous conclusions as a courtesy for your readership; good for you. Now on to the post.

Robots…Giant Robots!

Robo 1: I was reading through some yahoo headlines the other day when I saw that the trailer for the upcoming Transformers movie that actually showed what the autobots and decepticons would actually look like…cool. So I checked it out and I gotta tell you I was a little disappointed. Watch the trailer and you tell me. I guess, that to me, they look kinda too wired. By this I mean they don’t really have that definite exo-body like the original toys or cartoon. They look too much like a Disney auto matron without its skin. There are wires and hydraulics totally visible that compose most of their form. So, there is very little in the way of metal body components to let you identify what robot is what. I couldn’t pick out a single character besides Optimus Prime and that was only because I saw him as a big rig first.

Secondly, I am wondering how they are going to handle Megatron, the villainous leader of the decepticons. If you remember from the cartoon series his transformation would turn him from a menacing badass giant robot with an enormous laser cannon on his arm into a tiny laser pistol that would have to be fired by one of his subordinates.


VS.

A bit lack luster for such a cool bad guy. Not to mention the obvious physical issues like going from the size from a giant robot to the mass of a relatively tiny gun. So what are they going to do with him? Maybe turn him into a futuristic tank or something, that would be pretty cool.

Robo 2: LJ and I were driving some place when on the side of the road my nerd-eyes detected an old friend. Who was it? Why R2-D2.

Although now, apparently, he has gotten work as a postage box. Lucas must have cut his ass out of any character rights or post movie marketing deals so he is spending his days on the streets collecting mail for a living. Not too big a stretch if you consider his main roll in Star Wars: A New Hope was to deliver a message to Obi Wan Kenobi. The US postal service is running a pretty big add campaign right now to determine the choice for a new Star Wars stamp. This promises to be a bigger deal than the whole young or fat Elvis controversy (I voted young Elvis). Still, I encourage you guys to become a part of Star Wars history and cast a vote. I did. Also, look closely around town you may see R2 on some lonely sidewalk.

Robo 3: I saved the best for last. I was surfing some news blogs when a rather funny and unbelievable title hit me. “Jacko looks for a jackpot in Vegas with 50-ft. robot”. What the hell?! Let me summarize if you aren’t going to follow the convenient link I put up. Michael Jackson is currently in negotiations and planning stages of building an actual 50ft robot of himself that will wander the Nevada desert firing lasers and…I dunno…moonwalking I guess. I have one word to say about this, AWESOME! I would contribute to this project if I could. Hell, Rhodes had a colossus; New York has a giant statue in the bay and Vegas needs to have a fifty foot MJ that shoots lasers and is capable of molesting entire orphanages with a single robo-thrust. Seriously this is a really cool idea and if they could get it to work then I think they should. Japan, eat your heart out. You guys thought you had the whole giant mech market cornered; well think again.

4 comments:

Singularity said...

Yeah real good idea, a Michael Jackson Mech, you must under 40 inches to ride this ride.
I see R2 finally got a job now its time to see if we can get any work for Mark Hamill.

cj said...

Well, I WOULD comment except I believe in a comment for a comment and you, you rat-bastard, have left nothing on my blogspot so you will not get one pithy comment from me until then!

Da Beef said...

I picture the Michael Jackson robot looking eerily like the robot maid in Spaceballs. Is he going to go around the desert looking for little coyotes to molest? ;) And I did vote for the Star Wars stamp! Mark....that's awesome, your mom called you a rat-bastard!

cj said...

Oh, jeesh, I see yet ANOTHER Godzilla movie in the making...."Godzilla vs. The smooth operator/Thriller slamfest".

As for the R2D2 mailboxes, well, I think they are adorable and I do hope the post office has them wired to talk to you like the trash cans at Disney! However, I see this as a pathetic attempt by the U.S. Postal Service to lure us back to snail mail rather than e-mail and text messaging...dream on! This fits right in with their new idea of the everlasting stamp (is that like the everlasting gob stopper, you think?)that you pay one ginormous fee for and never have to pay for a stamp again. Get over it, U.S.P.S! Time marches on!

Oh, BTW, you are no longer a rat-bastard but you are still, and will always be a scofflaw!

Love, moms