Tuesday, March 06, 2007

I’m a Quitter

Well, it’s been a year and I did it. I have not touched a cigarette, cigar, pipe (of any description), joint, bong, hookah, etc. for one whole year. Thus proving, once and for all, that I could quit any time I felt like. Now I will be able to enjoy as many cigarettes as I wish without any feelings of dependency because I never really had an addiction. I can blow smoke in the face of any mother giving me the evil eye while shepparding her precious baby away. I can flick ashes on any up-tight Californian with a sanctimonious attitude. I can finally hold my cigarette high and pronounce to the world that though I enjoy the smooth refreshing feeling of my first morning drag I am not an addict. Take that Rob Reiner.

Seriously though, I feel good about it. I had been a smoker for a while and while I may not been as heavy a user as some or for as long as others, it was still very hard to give up. I think the most difficult thing wasn’t any kind of real addiction, but the association I made with everything over the course of smoking. I got into routines like; between shifts at work, or after dinner, or during sex. It was more habit forming due to my own mental associations with smoking than any nicotine fix I needed. I kinda think that the patch or the nicotine pills are placebos. I just don’t see how someone could really develop a dependency on something so gentle. Maybe hardcore drugs, but I think smoking can be as habit forming as McDonald’s food, alcohol and network television.

So now I’m trying to decide what to do with all the fat cash I am saving every month. I am in the process of saving for a PS3 and I’m almost there. Maybe I can mail it to the poor tobacco execs who seem to always be shilling out money to an overbearing government or some whinny ex-smoker with “cancer”. Or maybe I can put it into my newest fixation…chewing gum. Yup, I’m already a pack-a-day man with that habbit.


Da Beef said...

You smoke while you have sex. Those weren't "pizza stains" on the sheets...they were ashes. I see now. Poor Laura!

mommyjolle said...

Go back to chocolate frosting out of the can...it was an endearing habit and although it will also leave stains on the sheets it is harder to do while having sex.

Mad Mike said...

I quit also...on even days in months that have a R in them and odd days on all the others. It's working out great and I feel at least 50% healthier.