Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Cyclops Drunk

Well we made it through Hurricane Dennis all right. The power was out for a day and a half and nothing was really terribly damaged, not unless you count a four by five foot hole in the side of our house. LJ and I drove over to the pad right after the storm went over to discover that at the top of our place, just under the peak of the roof a large portion of wall was missing. Interestingly there was no water damage in the house…weird. So we’re getting that fixed. Our landlord kinda did a botched repair job on it already so Mike and I will have to pool our un-considerable home repair knowledge to make it right. The dude may as well have stuck two crisscrossing elephant sized band-aids over the hole for all the good it will do.

Anyway, that night we wanted to go out to eat since no one was hurt and our house was in good enough shape to continue living there (an honest concern when faced with any hurricane, trust me). We all go to an Irish pub/restaurant called Maguire’s to celebrate. The place is packed, but hey, no problem they have an open bar. Mike tells me I should try an “Irish Wake” and LJ seems interested so I order two. These drinks are served in mason jars and are filled halfway with liqueur before being topped off with fresh squeezed OJ.

I won’t make any excuses here. I got nailed, and yes on one drink. About halfway done I am already feeling like I have just shot gunned my third beer. With about a quarter remaining I am having a hard time walking strait. When I finish I am totally pissed. I have a confession to make now. You guys know the picture I use of myself on my page. You know, the one where I am holding the dollar in one hand the glass in the other, I have a grin from ear to ear and it appears as though I’m winking? Well, I’m not actually winking per say so much as trying to stem double vision. That look is something you only get when I am wicked drunk. It has only happened a few times because I am not usually a heavy drinker but it has occurred enough to earn me the drunken moniker “Winky”. Moving on, by the end of that one drink I was looking through mono-vision and my wife had to call the hotel she works at, conveniently situated right down the street, so that all of us could stumble over and sleep in a free room (*LJ wasn’t that drunk and drove down herself I feel compelled to add). Mike claims he wasn’t that drunk but I don’t believe it for a second and you shouldn’t either.

Now, I was told yesterday that I am a rather amusing drunk. I am fun to laugh at and with, and have a very jovial disposition. That makes me glad. I have known so many people who respond differently to alcohol that to be a joker is a blessing. Supposedly I’m quite the entertainer. Anyway, it was great to get out and loosen up after Dennis blew through. Incidentally, we are all making bets on what category Emily will make landfall as and where she will hit. My money is on category two and it will hit somewhere about thirty miles west of Pensacola. I’ve got ten bucks riding on it so Emily better deliver.

Oh, and if anyone is so inclined please link over to my wife’s site and wish here a happy 24th birthday it would mean a lot to her.

6 comments:

Lara said...

Wow! That's amazing you didn't suffer more damage than that. It was definitely right to go drink to celebrate. In face, I'm going to have a drink to celebrate for you!

duff said...

i found your blog through a friend of a friend and felt compelled to compliment you on your use of the "kitten/masturbation" header.

oh, and i'll pass on that "irish wake", thanks.

Singularity said...

That was a good night huh. It's amazing what a shit patch job was done and now we have to fix it. At least are house is still there though.

bobo said...

It has been a couple of days, any new theories on what actually caused the hole? That is pretty huge especially considering that you got no water damage.

Brillig said...

I got a pretty wild theory on how the hole actually happened...stay with me here. Because there was no debris inside the attic space and because the debris from the wall itself was scattered outside the house and because there were holes on both sides of the house that looked as they they were both blown out,I can only assume that Bernoulli is the cause. By this I mean Bernoulli's principal. The wind was hitting the house from the front and blowing past the outside walls, so it is resonable to assume that a vacuum was being created. Though I could be wrong, but I doubt it. Thank you, Thank you

Singularity said...

Or it could have been the attic gremlins. They may have been plotting this for months and the storm gave them the right moment for us to be out of the house so we couldn't hear them. Damn attic gremlins